Time goes by so fast and so our life as moms and as entrepreneurs, there are so many things to do that we lose the notion of the importance of connecting with our children.
has it happened to you that your children begin to have bad behavior? that they begin to do mischief more constantly wanting to attract your attention, and when you try to calm them down, it seems that they enjoy not following the instructions given by you, they do not obey the requests that we ask for as parents.
We believe that they simply do not want to obey but we do not take the time to understand why they do not want to obey.
Over time I have realized that by applying observation to my son’s behavior, he teaches me and helps me understand what is happening.
When I connect with my son, his receptivity towards the things I request of him becomes easier for him.
Not getting the attention of someone we really need is something that not only happens to children but also happens to all of us. I give you an example if you are with a group of friends and you want to speak particularly with one person and this person has his or her attention focused on a thousand places less on you, what is your reaction? Usually, you lose interest in wanting to talk to this person, you feel ignored and you no longer have a desire to communicate with that person, at least not at that moment. The same thing happens with our children, if you let the rush daily life and the things that have to be done always getting in between the two of you, then you will also become part of the landscape for them, which means that your children will not take seriously anything you are asking for, and you will no longer get the receptivity you want to obtain from them, and you will end up having to go through a bad moment and a great frustration before they really listen, what usually happens is that children listen to us when we are already angry and using a high tone of voice or even yelling.
Why is it important to strengthen this connection?, What benefits will it bring? And why is it important to you as a mom and as an entrepreneur?
• You will meet and discover beautiful things that your child has to teach you.
• You will understand their likes much more and you will understand what goes through their mind easier.
• You will have initiatives and ideas to do activities with your child.
• You will feel that you have had quality time with your child, which will give you peace of mind and more tranquility to be able to focus on your projects, leaving behind any type of guilt.
• A connection and communication will be created much more fluid which will let you make a request or ask him for a favor or demand something from him and then he will act accordingly and do what you are asking for with joy and without protesting at all.
• You will be able to establish routines without so many setbacks, which will favor your business hours.
This is of high importance and a really positive change because from there, it can trigger good behavior; This does not mean that the child will never have tantrums again or that they will never again disobey, NO. However, it will improve its behavior exponentially, making your days much easier and therefore your path in the development of your projects smoother.
Why is it important to your child?
• He/She will feel a deep connection with you that will allow him/her to have the confidence to speak to you, to share his/her thoughts with you, and your child will feel more secure.
• He/She will feel that he/she is valuable to you, he/she will feel that he/she is important to you, this will generate high self-esteem and tranquility in him/her, which will allow him/her to be more independent in his daily tasks.
• Your child development depends a lot on his/her connections
The bond that is formed between the mother and the child during their first years of life will directly affect the personality and behavior that the child may have in adulthood.
For example, some studies reveal that those children who may have capricious tendencies or serious behavior problems, maybe highly related to children whose demands have not been met or who have been subjected to various physical or psychological punishments, in their early life.
On the other hand, those less capricious children are those who have been cognitively and emotionally motivated by their mothers and whose demands had indeed been attended to.
When we establish the care of our children in love, understanding, and acceptance, we help them to grow in an environment of trust. From here they can freely and safely explore all their emotions and potentials, which will serve as a springboard to develop a full and happy adult stage.
When I speak of demands, I am talking about being attentive to what your child might be feeling and doing everything we can to understand them, I know that it is very difficult at certain times to handle situations properly, however, we can apply techniques to ourselves, to control our emotions (link to post emotions) since knowing how to understand and control our emotions will give us the power to generate a calmer environment and rescue that important connection with your child.
How to create these connections with your child:
Within your daily life, you can have many opportunities to develop these connections, for example, I usually take advantage of the following moments of my day:
• When we wake up: Although it is a short connection the hug, the kiss, the morning game cannot be absent in my home.
• In the activity of the day: I first organize what I can do with my children, I take out the activity, this depends on the age of your child, in my case, it works a lot for me to do puzzle activities, or with wooden tiles, cards to enrich his vocabulary, reading a story, painting and likewise while we are doing the activity, we are talking, and he is telling me what he thinks, he begins to interact much more and gives me more information about how he wants to play, and an environment of trust begins to let his imagination fly. My oldest son is almost 4 years old, my youngest daughter is 1 year old and with her, I have realized that she already likes to fit pieces of toys, so I organize wooden games that are easy for her age, this is amazing because I am helping with her motor skills.
• The time for breakfast, lunch, or dinner can be a great time to establish a conversation, even if your child is 1 day old, 1 month old, 1 year old, the conversations are important, they are already receiving all this information in their brain and have these activities greatly help their Development.
• One of my favorite moments of connection with my children is in the night routine (if you have not seen my post about night routine, I invite you to follow this link), the night routine gives you the opportunity to connect on a deeper level since it is time to be calm, it is time to rest, hugs, kisses, massages, and a story is the perfect opportunity to share and créate an amazing connection to end the day together. We managed to connect in such a way that they finally go to rest very calmly and I feel very peaceful to have had a good day with them which allows me to concentrate on my projects later, and leaves me with a feeling of accomplishment.
• Other connections that we fear together are dancing, singing, painting, we even watch cartoons together.
Enjoy these connections, the looks, the laughter, the physical contact, listening to their words, and each change in them, each moment of growth is spectacular for both you and them.
There is time for everything you really want to do and achieve and so…
Many people ask me, how do you do to do all these activities and still have time to develop your digital projects?
Well, there is no magic, I have the same hours of the day as you, you do not need to do 100 activities a day to connect if you organize within your day at least 2 or 3 activities with them that you are fully present that will make a huge change.
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• The time for breakfast, lunch, or dinner can be a great time to establish a conversation, even if your child is 1 day old, 1 month old, 1 year old, the conversations are important, they are already receiving all this information in their brain and have these activities greatly help their Development.
• One of my favorite moments of connection with my children is in the night routine (if you have not seen my post about night routine, I invite you to follow this link), the night routine gives you the opportunity to connect on a deeper level since it is time to be calm, it is time to rest, hugs, kisses, massages, and a story is the perfect opportunity to share and créate an amazing connection to end the day together. We managed to connect in such a way that they finally go to rest very calmly and I feel very peaceful to have had a good day with them which allows me to concentrate on my projects later, and leaves me with a feeling of accomplishment.
• Other connections that we fear together are dancing, singing, painting, we even watch cartoons together.
Enjoy these connections, the looks, the laughter, the physical contact, listening to their words, and each change in them, each moment of growth is spectacular for both you and them.
There is time for everything you really want to do and achieve and so…
Many people ask me, how do you do to do all these activities and still have time to develop your digital projects?
Well, there is no magic, I have the same hours of the day as you, you do not need to do 100 activities a day to connect if you organize within your day at least 2 or 3 activities with them that you are fully present that will make a huge change.
Insanont You’re so awesome! I don’t believe I have read a single thing like that before. So great to find someone with some original thoughts on this topic. Really.. thank you for starting this up. This website is something that is needed on the internet, someone with a little originality!